Life and Jogging!

Life and Jogging

If you have jogged, weight trained or involved yourself in a physical activity that requires a commitment and is also strenuous on the body you can relate to my story.

Moreover, see if you can recognize the commonality between this particular experience and how most of us experience everyday life.

The Commitment

I decided on a Saturday evening that I was going to commit to an exercise program and go on a 5 mile run early Sunday morning. I even made a point of announcing this decision to Linda, my wife, who in turn gave me the positive feedback I was searching for.

Feeling pretty good about the decision I noticed my thoughts or the voice in my head, at this stage were totally on my side saying things such as; “Getting back on track with running will be great” “I feel better already” ”Let’s get the gear laid out”.

Start Your Engine

On Sunday morning,  as I lay in bed contemplating the commitment I made to myself and the announcement I had made about it to Linda, I immediately observed a shift in my thoughts from positive to negative. Suddenly there were many thoughts appearing in my mind about why I should stay in bed;

“You don’t have to rush to do this” You deserve another 15 minutes of sleep” “Maybe you don’t have to jog today” “It feels so good to just be in bed” ”You rarely take time to do nothing; do nothing now” .

Conversely those thoughts are no where found when I have that rare ‘sleep-in-day’, a special day when I give myself permission to stay in bed later than usual. 

More often than not on my ‘sleep-in-day’ I am not able to sleep in because I often feel unusually energized. Reminiscent of my childhood when Saturday would come around and I would be up at the crack of dawn for cartoon watching, yet I would need to be towed out of bed for school during the week days.

The Observer

So this particular morning I ignored being drawn in by my mind or voice in my head and just observed as it continued to negotiate all the various reasons for quitting or putting off this ominous 5 mile jog.

Not becoming totally absorbed by the minds chatter allowed space for me to consciously get out of bed and actually be aware of each foot landing on the coolness of the carpet, the tightness of the muscles in my legs and stiffness in my back as I stood up and moved across the room. The minds chatter is reduced to background noise as I am intensely aware and detached from the thoughts.

I am totally in the moment walking across the room and aware of my breathing as air slowly fills my lungs and then slowly exhaled. I held the awareness as I dressed; aware of putting each sock on, aware of each arm going through my shirt then my head etc.

There is a qualitative difference being totally aware of an activity you are presently involved in versus being lost in thought and unconsciously attempting the same task.

For example when you are lost in thought, you might experience fumbling with your clothes not noticing at first your shirt is on inside-out. Or when putting your sock on you mistakenly put it on with the heel section over the toes. 

Then mindlessly making the proper adjustments you get verbal with the clothing because it is not cooperating.

“What is wrong with you” “What the. . .”  “Come on!”

As if the clothing was purposely fighting against you. Funny, but not so much when you are actually so lost in thought that you are having this dialogue with your clothing.

The Voice in Your Head is not Always Your Friend

I eventually hit the pavement and noticed that my mind once again wanted to be the center of my attention and to draw me in completely. Especially after mile one; it was now counseling me with various instructions;

“You need to slow down, or you won’t have enough juice to finish!” It’s too hot, you didn’t dress properly!” “This is a mistake, you can’t run 5 miles!”

Again, instead of being taken in by my minds chatter I again consciously notice my breathing. Aware of the air filling my lungs and expanding in my chest and stomach and following it as I exhaled and my stomach gently collapsing with each controlled breath.

My conscious attention shifted between breathing and noticing the wind on my face, my arms and body, the deep blue of the sky, the sounds of birds singing and an occasional car passing by.

Amazing how conscious awareness to ‘what is’ in the moment always reduces the stream of mind chatter to background noise.

At mile 3 my mind once again front and centered in my awareness with various complaints; “How come you didn’t bring water?” You are never going to make it now!” “Is that a pain in your hamstring?” “Yes, that old nagging hamstring is tightening up, stop now!”

I took a quick inventory of my body and nothing was 911. Actually it was going pretty well so I focused my attention on the one step I was taking at the moment; heel down rocking off the toes to the next heel down then off those toes, arms down and loosely swaying in a side-to-side rhythm, a dog in that yard, someone mowing their lawn, the warmth of the sun on my head.

Again my negative mind became background noise and the sights and sounds of the moment;  the ‘what is’ of the moment; whatever happened to appear was where my focus of attention settled and running just became part of’ ‘what is’ with no problems.

Home Stretch

As I came upon the last mile my mind knew how far I had run and it then seemed to intensify.

“You can stop now, you did great” “I don’t think you can make it any further” “No one will know you stopped short of the 5 miles” “You can count this as your cool down and walk the rest of the way” “You are hurting yourself, stop now”

I continued to stay present consciously observing the one step I was making at the moment, my breathing or whatever came into my field of consciousness; people walking by, sensation of my running clothes on my body. I was aware and I knew it.

Intense awareness of the cycle of one breath serves as a powerful tool for being presently aware and quieting the mind.

As I intently stayed totally present it created a space or separation between me and those pesky and mostly negative thoughts and reduced them to mere background noise every time they made their assault and screamed for my complete attention.

There have been many times in my life when the thoughts had me instead of me having the thoughts.

In the past when the thought had me and I was not aware enough to realize it; I have stopped running, or didn’t even get out of bed or did not keep a promise to myself or ate too much, drank too much, said too much etc.

Afterwards to be attacked by my thoughts in the form of guilt;

“You are a quitter and you will never get in shape”, You should have gotten out of bed when the alarm rang”, “What an idiot!”, “You are doomed to repeating these mistakes over and over because you never get it” ”You are so stupid””Why did you say that?” “Why don’t you just give up?”

I Knew You Could Do It

Completing the 5 miles felt great and although I could feel it physically it was not too much. As I started my cool down which consisted of a ¾ mile walk I noticed the voice in my head spoke as if it were a long-lost friend.

 “Wow, you did great” “You are in better shape than you thought” “I bet you could run another couple of miles” “I knew you could do it”

I discounted even those thoughts because as enticing as they sounded I knew allowing myself to be drawn into those thoughts is to be drawn back into unconsciousness; the stream of thinking.

Instead I noticed the cycle of my breathing; my stomach gently lifting as my lungs filled with air then the gentle release of air as my chest and stomach gently contract. Aware of walking as my heel goes down and then rock off my toes my leg lifting and the heel of my other leg repeating the same process, the rhythm of my arms loosely swaying side-to-side.

I notice the cars waiting for the traffic signal light to change. I feel my finger push the round metal button of the signal switch on the traffic signal pole. I notice the weight of my body on my feet, the sun is warm on my head, a drip of sweat runs down my face; I am the moment and there are no problems.

 I have just run 5 miles!

The Commonality

I mention this running experience because I have noticed this same mind pattern manifesting as a commentary in my head in all aspects of my life.  This phenomenon is absolutely dysfunctional and yet normal for most of our civilization.

There is a qualitative difference experiencing the moment as a conscious observer versus reacting to the moment unconsciously through the filter of old conditioned thought patterns.

Are you having a thought? Or is the thought having you?

This is the difference between actually ‘being here’  consciously in the moment in non-reaction and knowing it, observing your thoughts versus unconsciously and mechanically reacting being totally absorbed and drawn in by the old thought patterns unaware that it is even happening.

For example; you don’t get up with the alarm, you don’t go for the run, you choose the wrong food, you drink too much, you worry, you are anxious, you say the wrong thing  and regret it and you blame something or someone else for your problems.

Better Results

Becoming more aware and present in this now moment allows you to break the old patterns of cause and effect that have kept you going in circles; as in broken resolutions for too long.

You defeat what was previously defeating you by becoming the conscious observer of your mind. You are no longer lost in the fog of mind streams and unconsciously reacting. 

There is now a space for a higher intelligence to enter the moment as you rise above thinking and are totally aware of the one step you are now taking. You are experiencing better results and you are more at ease with yourself and others.

Confidence and self-esteem arise as a natural component of no longer being defeated in this moment versus trying to convince yourself that you are confident etc by a adopting some belief or thought and being shot down in the process.

Suddenly you realize you just ran 5 miles!

It is simple to be successful or happy in the one step we are presently taking . . . now. 

 Consider this. Life always happens in this moment; there is no other moment. If we are successful and happy in this one step we are taking now, we are successful and happy now! 

It is futile to be waiting for happiness or success to arrive in some distant future, which will never come.

Why, because when it does come it will be now! Life always happens now and it is never not now. Amazingly simple yet difficult because thinking obscures it and we hardly ever observe our thinking.

Life really is like jogging because in both the main obstacle is not the run but the voice in the head; thinking.

There is nothing more empowering than to experience for yourself (not as an idea, thought or belief) the immediate benefits of becoming more present and aware in the one and only moment we all live…the Now!

To Your Success! 

George Kuczek

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